Skruffy’s Last Bark?

Breath in, breath out...
 
I remember that day as if it was yesterday, the day of the rescue. She brings you to me, sets you in my lap. I pet your head, your ears, your collarless neck. My hand roams down to your chest, and to your tummy...you bend and twist giving me access to the lower tummy as if I had been doing this all your life. She comes back to take you from my arms, you give that Skruffy growls of yours. “Oh my!” she exclaims. “What?” I ask. “She has proclaimed it already...in just ten short minutes...she owns you...” Owns me? I wonder...I thought I was rescuing her, not the other way around. She, Skruffy, is right...she owns me now. She owns a part of my heart that only Snoopy had seen before. My cats, no way...yes, they were loved, but the heart strings they never touched. Some people have a special place in their hearts for dogs...some for cats...many don't have it at all. But the dogs and cats know who you are, and they gladly take advantage of taking their own little leash and tie it right to that special place into your heart...as Skruffy had done to me.
 
Again I hear it...breath in, breath out...
 
Those cold, wet, thunder filled nights as you were lost out in that large lot before the rescue, hiding under trucks, took something from your heart girl...you never wanted to be alone again...you never wanted to be away from he, from me, the one you now owned. To work with me you came, out of desperation at first, but within days it became the norm. Eventually I could leave my office without you barking...for 5 minutes first, then ten...I don't think you ever made it to fifteen. But eventually your barking became a single solitary bark, followed by listening for my voice, sniffing to try and find my scent. Staff would come in and say, “It's alright Skruffy girl, he will be back real soon.” The Library would quiet down again, for 5 or 10...then that bark came back, followed by listening, followed by smelling, followed by yet another bark. And when I return the joy is indescribable...it was if I was gone for hours and hours, yet it had only been 20 to 30 minutes. Yes, my little girl, I am back...and quiet again reigned...until the next time I had to step out. Had my office had a hard floor instead of carpet, I would have heard the tap tap tap of your little feet as they move back and forth from excitement. Oh, how I love that sound.
 
There it is, I hear it again...breath in, breath out...
 
You eventually earned my trust, I'd let you go off leash from the car to inside our trailer at the RV Park...unless you saw a squirrel off in the distance, and away you ran despite my pleas. From tree to tree you would go as squirrels would be alerted and shoot up into the trees. Your short little legs would carry you fast and far, your ears flapping in the wind, your bark breaking the silence, except for the chirping of the birds. I followed as quick as I could, I call out to your deafening ears, but eventually your lungs give out, your legs grow tired.  You turn and look at me like, “Why are you breathing so hard, it was I who was running all around? But did you see them, did you?? Squirrel after squirrel, and they all ran up into the trees afraid of little me!” When the library was closed and it was only us there, I would let you go off leash from the car into the Library, or from the Library to the car...until that one Saturday evening when you saw a wedding carriage being pulled by a pair of horses, way across the huge parking lot, heading to the hotel across the street for their reception. Off you ran, barking and barking...I could only imagine how much larger each of those horses started to look as you got within 90 yards, within 70 yards, because around 50 yards you stop...you give them your three Skruffy Barks, you turn and walk triumphantly back to me...wondering why I have my hands up to my brow shaking my head back and forth as you walk, head raised high...but then you stop, look back and give another Skruffy bark. You come to me, stop short looking at me like, “Well, I doubt they will mess with Skruffy again!”
 
And again...breath in, breath out...
 
Then into our lives came two others. “Who is she, and does 'he' have to come with her?” you wondered. “Yes I have found another to share my life with, but don't worry, my dear Skruffy, you still own me. And as for 'he', he is Bubba...your new brother, but don't worry, you are still going to be the queen.” Within a year the Library becomes a retired memory, and now even more travels. Before Marcia and Bubba came into our lives, we had traveled up to Missouri to visit papa and grandma a few times, and you even went with me to Denver for some meetings that I had—remember you went to the Doggie Daycare, where I could watch you over the Internet while listening to speaker after speaker in my meeting talking about Library stuff. After Marcia and I married, there were times she needed to be in Florida while you and I still had to work at the Library. We would travel back and forth to Florida during those times. If we stopped so I could get some rest, you would watch out the window protecting our little car. Oh how I will miss those barks that awoke me so many times. But now we have a motorhome, and the real travels begin. 
 
A bit fainter now...breath in, breath out.
 
Our first trip took all four of us to many fascinating places...the large trees of Sequoia, the wonderful walls and falls of Yosemite, the tall Coastal Redwoods, the deep blues of Glacier Lake, the waves along the Oregon Coast, the aroma of the Roses in Portland, the devastation of Mount St. Helens, the elk and buffalo of Yellowstone, the Mountains of Glacier Park. We saw bears, goats, sheep, deer, elk, buffalo and antelope. Future trips over the next few years included places like Zion and Arches, the balloons of Albuquerque, the homes of Mesa Verde, the deep dark forest of Olympia, names on rock walls along the Oregon Trail, cheese and ice cream from Tillamook. Every time we stopped the motorhome, there were new smells, new places to mark, new adventures for you and Bubba. Of course, there was always your favorite place of all...the backyard of Sandy and Arnys...where the squirrels were so close you could touch them, the grass so green and luscious that you could lay in it, treats so plentiful, and so many family and friends around. You could be trusted completely now, and off leash you would run over to Papa’s and Grandma's since they moved back to California and lived next door to Sandy. Of course, I overlook that time you, off leash, you decide to take off up the hill while visiting the Redwoods...or at that large park in Oregon where you saw some squirrels off in the distance...and into the distance you ran until your little legs got tired and you walk back to me who was in chase.
 
Fainter still...breath in, breath out...a hesitation.
 
You earned your badge in later years, you became a Service Dog for Marcia, to assist with certain needs. There were always those few months where you were needed at the Condo, no brother around, you had us to yourself. Then winter would be over, and off we would travel again. You heard me calling out for a long drive north, to Alaska I say, where there would be so much space, so many things to see, clean air to breath, and so many animals. But it was there that a new frontier opened up. A sore at first, then near death which tore my heart wide open, until we found she, the fisherman of small dogs, who tries to bring you back to us so that we could enjoy more time, more travels, until that last breath, that last hesitation which does not stop, the cold taste of death. And then I will be owned no more... free from your dedication, your love, your barks, your scratches, your walks. Then it will be your time to play with Snoopy, no pain, never fearing to be alone again. 
 
A bit stronger now...breath in, breath out...
 
That fisherman, she is not only a great fisherman, but she is also a great veterinarian. She sits up with you way after hours, she instantly falls for you, just as so many others have. The right dosage of this, the right amount of liquid food to run through your veins. All the while I have put out word onto our blog, on Facebook, through text messages and phone calls (though the calls are few since it is hard for the words to come out)...PRAY for our little Skruffy Girl! A few days later, after many visits to see you, after many prayers too numerous to count, you come home with us. It is struggle, but you are calmer at home, you sleep, you start to eat, you start to recover. Then the set-back hits...it is 4^th of July weekend, but we handle it, and you get stronger yet. Finally the news today...test show you are in full recovery...the cold taste of death will need to wait for another day...many years as far as we are concerned. But the thought of losing you...the thought of being free...why does it hurt so very much? I don't want to break those chains which are connected to that part of my heart. I now have a taste, again, of what it will be like to have that part of my heart empty again, I don't like it – the ache is beyond description. How fortunate we are that we found the Soldotna Animal Hospital, found that fisherman of little dogs who goes by the name of Meezie, and how blessed we are that God has heard and answered those many prayers. My heart is filled with joy...the ache will need to wait for another day...another year...many years I hope.
 
Much stronger now...breath in, breath out...and there it goes, “BARK, BARK, BARK”, yes, the Skruffy bark is back, it is like music to our ears, it warms the heart just so... Last Bark? Nope, many more barks to come!

Skruffy Has GOOD NEWS – Kinda

Skruffy went in for what we thought was going to be her final visit to Soldotna Animal Hospital…definitely her last visit with Dr. Meezie Hermansen because she is off for the next month due to her commercial fishing gig. 

But before the news…let’s look at the past 7 days.  As you can see, the hair on her belly area is nearly gone.  Most of that is due to the ultrasound she had last week…but she has lost a lot of hair in the past three weeks, that’s for sure.  Last Wednesday (June 29th) we put her on a liver medication called Denamarin.  Gave her a pill Wednesday afternoon, Thursday morning and Friday morning (best given after 10-12 hour fast.)   Well, we noticed Thursday night that her appetite had weakened.  By Friday morning, she was refusing all food.  Marcia and I talked about it and decided to stop the Denamarin and the antibiotic because Skruffy eating was the most important thing right now.  The Vet from Anchorage called Friday evening to see how Skruffy was doing, and she concurred with stopping the medication (she is the one who suggested this medication to Dr. Meezie.)  By Saturday she would eat out of Marcia’s hand, by Sunday she progressed from hand to hand and some out of her dish.  She had totally given up on her Diabetic Hill’s Prescription foods, so I was cooking up some ground chicken, Marcia made some brown rice, and complimented it with grilled chicken breast strips and grilled pork strips (no spices, no oils, just meat).  On Sunday when we headed over to Homer, Marcia noticed that Skruffy’s color on her belly was yellow, her gums were white with some only hint of pink, and to complicate things…she had not pooped since Thursday night.  We both thought her liver was shutting down…  On Monday (4th of July) I got an infant suppository manufactured by PediaLax.  Used half of one dose, and within 15 minutes things started to flow.  It was an awful bright gold color, very runny at first, very disgusting (no pictures, sorry).  But she ate a bit better Monday night.  At 3 am I hear this bark…ask Marcia if she heard it.  As we started to fall back asleep, there is the clear bark of Skruffy again, she is at the front door.  Gotta hurry, let her out and there goes some more!  Gotta say, it was the only fireworks we saw in this area where it is too light to really do fireworks on the 4th (which was now the 5th).  By Tuesday, her poop started to look more like normal.

By bedtime Tuesday (the 5th) we start feeling like there is hope for the girl. She ate both breakfast and dinner within 30 minutes of getting her insulin shot.  She had much more energy, so much so that when I took her on one of her three walks Tuesday, she actually pulled on the leash.  She jumped up into the motorhome so quick, she went right over to my chair and tried to jump into it before I got into the motorhome (first time she had tried to make that jump in over 3 weeks.)  And as we looked over her belly last night, we both saw some pink coming back, and her gums definitely had pink and even red to them.  And her appetite was back, and I started mixing her dog food with the ground chicken before I cooked it, and added less rice to the mixture.  It looked like we might have gotten over the hump.

Skruffy dog is more alert, more active, getting her color back, barking at other dogs again, taking good walks, eating, peeing, pooping, and loving to be on either of our laps.  Yes, she still sleeps more than she use to…she does not like her glucose test, but does not mind the insulin injection.   In the past six days I had over 20 glucose readings, especially the important glucose curve reading showing how long it took for her blood sugar to hit rock bottom after an injection and start to climb again…and how far it would fall after a shot.  I emailed a pdf of the chart I had made of the glucose readings to the vets office, and also put it on my Kindle.  So off we went to see Dr. Meezie today, her last day at work (as a Vet) before she starts the job she was born to do (fishing) for the next month. 

Good news…she is no longer Anemic…her red blood cells are back to the normal level, as are most of her other readings.  Bad news, her liver enzymes are way too high…8 to 10 times higher than normal…and her white blood cells are still a little high.  Had it been just the white blood cells, Dr. Meezie would have given her a pass.  But what we don’t know is if the liver enzymes are high due to what she went through over the weekend, or is that why she went through what she did over the weekend.  Because she is eating well, holding her food down, peeing and  pooping,  having more energy, and loosing her yellow coloring, Dr. Meezie “thinks” that they are high because of her problems, and are on their way down.  So we decided to start up the antibiotic again, hold off on the Denamarin, come back Friday to see Dr. Bowser or Meezie’s month long replacement who is up from New Mexico to enjoy the cool Alaska weather and get away from the hot New Mexico weather, and run the liver test again.  “IF” the Liver enzymes are falling to more normal levels, then off we go with a dog who has a good chance to a much longer life.  “IF” they remain high…we have a dog who will be lucky to make it out of Alaska, let alone all the way back to California, and especially to Florida.  Though still worried a bit, we are confident, with all the positive readings, that the liver tests on Friday will be better. 

Tonight we finally had dinner with Chuck and Debbie.  Chuck is the twin brother of Bill who lives near us in Florida.  Due to Skruffy’s condition, we asked them if we could postpone our get together last week.  They too use Dr. Meezie, and totally understood that Skruffy was our first concern right now.  We had a great dinner and a great time, nice to meet you Chuck and Debbie…hope you make it down to Florida one of these days.  Another “small world” thing…just across from us is a family from Missouri who come up to Alaska every summer to commercial fish.  They leave their 5th wheel and two vehicles up here all year round.  My parents lived in Missouri for many years in the same town, and yes…my parents know the mother's parents, and my cousin was the 6th grade teacher of one of her sisters, and my cousin has known her dad for many years…even went to college together.  Now that’s a small world, here in Alaska, the largest State of the United States of America.